The Daily Tribune
Collegeport Column
May 27, 1930
 

Collegeport Day 1930

 

The community dinner as on all previous occasions was all the most exacting gastronomer could wish. Don't any person tell me that this community is hard up. A glance at the table would convince the observer of its untruthfulness, for there were placed ready for service, pies, cakes breads, meats, salads, fruits, preserves to repletion.

 

The principle item I looked for was the Famous Carrie Nelson Noodles and there they were in all their glory, a platter full, just about one service for a noodle lover. If every other plate was one of noodles the dinner would have been complete. Panting lizards! What more could a hungry man ask for than noodles unless it were more noodles. I was sorry that Mr. Haisley who asked the blessing did not ask God to give his special blessing on those noodles. Delicious, refreshing, nourishing, satisfying, sustaining. I know of no food that nestles in the "tummy" with more comfort. Abajo you common ordinary "vittels." Then there was that special coffee that only Carrie Nelson knows how to brew. Strong enough to float three eggs, clear as amber, stimulating. Gosh, what can one find another such draught.

 

The tables in charge of Mrs. Liggett, a past mistress of table service, were decorated in a tasty manner and reflected credit on her and the assistants. Well every one turned in and filled their plates and soon nothing could be heard except the gnashing of teeth and vocal expressions of complete satisfaction. It was a great day for it was an occasion for old friends to meet. Isaac Miller and wife with their son and wife and a guest all from Houston. Mrs. Leo Duffy from El Campo with her sweet new baby in the arms of Grandmother Fulcher, Barbara Hale with Tom Hale, Jr., from Wadsworth. Mrs. Amos Johnson with her five children from Citrus and others all there to chat and gossip and have friendly and neighborly converse.

 

About seventy-five all told because of road conditions, but that many agreeable folks. In the afternoon came the sports the first on the card being the ball game between the women and the school girls with the following lineup:

 

Women--

Mrs. Kundinger, pitcher.

Mrs. Hale (Barbara), 1b.

Mrs. Harbison, 2b.

Mrs. Goode, 3b.

Mrs. Hurd, ss.

Mrs. Brimberry, rf.

Mrs. Ackerman, lf.

Mrs. Murry, cf.

 

Girls--

Tootsie Chiles, p.

Aline Harbison, c.

Rosalie Nelson, 1b.

Josephine Della Betta, 2b.

Maggie Goode, 3b.

Annetta Johnson, ss.

Ermine Harbison, rf.

Jane Ackerman, lf.

Unknown, cf.

 

It was not a fair deal to put in Hattie Kundinger, for she was at one time a semi-pro playing on the Colby, Kansas team. Neither was it sporty to make Carrie Nelson the team captain for her proper place is over a mess of those salubrious noodles. Mrs. Wright playing out. Captain Nelson took her place in the box and swung some vigorous balls at the batter. The casualties were few. Hattie Kundinger tore a slit in her left sock and unless the cold drink business picks up will wear rolled down sox rest of the season.

 

Carrie Nelson suffered from a bum finger, but amputation will not be required. Score 20 plus, to seven in favor of the babies.

 

The day and the school year ended with a pot-pourri of voodville song, dances, acrobatic stunts, duologues. I am a little bit--no, why lie about it, sore because this phantasy was not better advertised, for it was the best thing ever presented on the local boards. In present day hoofing, this show fits like a pair of fine jodhpores, if you know what that means. From first curtain to the final it was synthetic glamour of lights, flashing legs, sweet young faces. I was a bewildered and docile looker on, while the miserable wretch simply acted awful, so convulsed was she with laughter. The big break goes to Jerrymae Brazil in her dance of the scarf. It was graceful to the extreme. A natural born dancer this little girl needs only training to become an artist. While Jerry was superb, I have a sneaking suspicion that in the acrobatic stunts performed by Jerry with Aline Harbison and Josephine Dalla Betta that they come in next.

 

While Ermine Harbison as the clown, worked herself into a comedy of lather it failed to obscure the antics of the three acrobats.

 

The skit by Mamie Franzen the ardent lover, Francis King the willing recipient of love words and Tootsie Chiles the young brother was a rib roaster. It was entitled "Oh! Mr. Merck."

 

The two Penland Brothers in black face work were quite real and they got off some good and new gags.

 

"Say, what is the difference between a flea and a snake?" Well the difference is that a snake crawls on its own belly and a flea crawls on your belly."

 

"Say, do you know that fellow with a big while hat?" That's Roy Nelson and he is a cow man. "That other fellow with a big white hat and a pair of horn specks is Stanley Wright and he is an old maid."

 

The orchestra lead by Sig. Elizatortoni Eeselzatta was of musical treat even if the instruments were improvised of shoe boxes, harmonicas, tin pans, et cetera.

 

Such wonderful music as the Signor produced with his magical baton. It rivaled the tom-tom of the hidden orchestra, which played during intermission. Resplendent in powdered wigs, panniered skirts, split tailed coats was the minuet, performed by eight of the lower grades. It was beautiful and graceful act and brought down the house. Each one performed in a charming manner. When Ethel Nelson came on one asked: "Wot have we here?" The answer came at once "She's not a wot, she's a witch." And she truly is a little witch.  She always knows her onions. I suspect from the way he swaggered, that Milford Austin Liggett had in his pocket the two bones he won the night before. The show did not mean a thing; it was not planned to mean anything, but it was easy to look at. It was a superb-superb talking, singing, dancing, screaming, howling masterpiece, that reflects credit on the Misses Williamson and Franzen, the teachers who did the drilling. Thus ended a happy day and a successful school year. More next year.

 

Taken from "Thoughts About What Happened May 30, 1630"

The Daily Tribune, Tuesday, May 27, 1930

 

 

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