April 16th  1893

 

Mr. J. J. Meeks,

 

My dear Brother I am so at a loss for words to express my sad and broken hearted feeling this is quite a task for me to even write you my troubles.  Jud it is useless to mention all the particulars but must say to you that I feel like it is hard to stand but such is life and while it is my time to give up one nearest and dearest to me on earth it is no more than others are compeled to do but yet it doesn’t make it any lighter for me to dear.  While it was God’s will to take my darling from me yet I cannot help grieving it was so unexpected and she was in such good health only a few hours before she died we were up at Mr. Paten milking his cows and tending to his thing as he was from home and ask us to attend to them for him.  Oh Jud you don’t know how my heart aches when I look at those little Mother less darlings of mine 4 in numbers the baby is a boy.  No Mother to sooth them nor wife to console me in my troubles .  Oh! God how miserable I feel.  I thought my lot was a hard one before but now it has quite a different feature.  But thank God she died slaping her hands and thanking God for taking her away what a consolation to her loved ones here.  Jud a little while before she died she called me she said (Oh!  Wilson Good bye darling Good bye).  I shall never forget those dying words of my (darling Florence).  I never knew how will I loved her until God taken her from me I can’t tell you what I will do I and the children are at Mr. Simpson’s now Mr. And Mrs. Simpson say they will help me to take care of them the best they can but for them I cannot say what I would do.  I wish you and Etta were here to help me some.  But If you can do better there I would hate for you to be here and have to live like the rest of us we are needing rain very much we had a light shower last night but not enough to do much good hope we will get more soon.  I have no news of interest aside from my own troubles.  Etta my Dear Sister if you will allow me to term it I neglected in my last letter to Jud to say one word to you then and now I have to write for her you will please pardon me for not writing sooner I received your letter to Florence the same day you wrote your last after you had heard of her death.  Etta we know we can never see her on earth again but sweet to know we can meet her in heaven if we only try how glad I would be to see you and Jud as you feel nearer than ever to me we were all married the same night and have been together so much and now to think there is one less and our time will soon come lets try and be ready to go in peace to join her in Heaven talk to Jud and tell him not to procrastinate and the sooner the better.  May God help you to accomplish your aim is my prayer.  Etta you don’t know how I wish you could have been here when my Darling called to Heaven it would have been better if you could have spoken a few words to her as it was the last opportunity in this world.  Etta pray God to help me bear my troubles and to strenthen me in my weakness and to help me to raise and direct my little baby in the right way for them to go to please God.  I was glad to hear of yours and Juds and the childrens good health hope you will get along allright.  I can’t say I will evr see you all again but if I never pray for me is my request.  Floy and Clifton are out at play Grace is playing around my knee.  No Florence Oh! My God how can I ever get reckonsiled to this unexpected blow God help me I pray poor little children I sometimes feel like it would be better if we were all dead.

 

Etta excuse my badly written letter and you and Jud write soon and all you can as it is a pleasure to here from you.

 

    As Ever

 

    W.  P. Wilson