You Know You're Addicted to Genealogy if/when....

you finally realize it's been almost 4 years since you last updated this page.
~ from Your Host, Virginia

I found the following circulating on the Web and decided we could have some fun with it ourselves.
We might as well laugh at ourselves, others already are!
Put on your thinking caps, let those creative juices flow and send your submissions to ME
PLEASE include your NAME, HOMETOWN/CITY and STATE.
Just put ADDICTED in the subject line.
Remember, the object is to complete the sentence "You know you're addicted to genealogy if/when....".
Have fun, and don't forget to laugh. It's not that difficult, give it a try!

Use your browser's [BACK] button to return to the page you were on.

** Joanne Riddle -- thanks for the Addicted to Genealogy gif **
June 2003 - added 33 new GEMS, Enjoy!

ARCHIVES - HISTORICAL SOCIETY

you plan your vacation from work to go to a historical society down state. ~ from Sheila Stratton-Peel, New York
you buy a lap top computer just to have for visiting the archives. ~ from Carla Odom, Virginia
your children buy you a bumper sticker that says "Get out of my way, the archives opens at 9:00 a.m." ~ from Carla Odom, Virginia
you arrive at the out-of-state archives having the most data about your lineage and the staff greets you by first and last name. ~ from Carla Odom, Virginia
a private investigator visiting the archives wants to hire you full time because you know how to find dead people better than he does. ~ Nancy Grace, Texas

CEMETERY - FUNERAL HOME

your 5 year old daughter points out cemeteries whenever we're in the car and asks if we've got any dead people in each cemetery. ~ from Robin Sloan, Indiana
you are on vacation and your children yell "Speed up Dad" when they see a cemetery in the distance. ~ from Norma Huss, ?
you hyperventilate at the sight of an old cemetery.
you'd rather browse in a cemetery than a shopping mall.
you'd rather spend the day in the basement of your hometown funeral home, going over their records, than go fishing. ~ from Cladia Doyle, Louisiana
most of your vacation pictures were taken in a cemetery. ~ from Your Host, Virginia
your only outdoors activity is traipsing through cemeteries. ~ from Your Host, Virginia
you send Christmas cards with a picture of a cemetery on it - (I got one!) ~ from Nancy Green, Colorado
you are at your father's funeral and you ask people you have never met, "And your parents are who??" ~ from Michael Harding, Florida
you have to update your genealogy files BEFORE you attend the funeral of a family member. ~ from Ron Webb, Hawaii
you drive through the county of your family's origin and the car keeps breaking at each cemetery regardless of who is buried there. ~ from Carla Odom, Virginia
you open the trunk of your car to place the groceries and always find it filled with the "cemetery kit" complete with three cameras, bug spray, scrub brushes, tall boots, sun hat, umbrella, note pads, brooms, rakes, hedge clippers, magnifying glasses, large rubbing papers, pencils, a first aid kit and a snake bite kit. ~ from Carla Odom, Virginia
you have to explain to the OFFICER that you didn't see his red lights or hear his siren because you were busy looking at directions to the LOST cemetery. ~ from Patricia Hill, Kentucky

CENSUS

you'd rather read census schedules than a good book.

CORRESPONDENCE

you realize you e-mailed the wrong will or land deed to the wrong side of the family. ~ from Helen Keusch, ?
your correspondence begins: Dear_____________, You don't know me but... ~ from Nancy Green, Colorado
you have an uncontrollable compulsion to write letters. ~ from Laura Tuttle, Florida
you swear at the mailman when he doesn't leave mail. ~ from Laura Tuttle, Florida
all your correspondence begins, "Dear Cousin,"

COURT - COURTHOUSE - COURT CLERKS

you have more fun reading the dirty books at the courthouse than anything Hugh Hefner could write. ~ from Norma Huss, ?
you carry a flashlight in your purse hoping to get locked in the courthouse vault overnight. ~ from Norma Huss, ?
the courthouse bathroom is just across the hall and you go all day without using it. ~ from Janet Cochran, Kentucky
you know every town clerk in your state by name.
town clerks lock the doors when they see you coming.
you go on vacation and you realize your scenic routes include every town's courthouse and cemetery. ~ from Claudia Doyle, Louisiana

EVENTS

you are never sure of this year's dates. ~ from Dottie Austin, North Carolina
you're more interested in what happened in 1697 than 1997.
you spend part of your honeymoon walking through a cemetery in the rain (we did). ~ Nancy Grace, Texas

FAMILY - CHILDREN - PETS

hours later you vaguely remember your children saying "come on we can do anything now Mom's into genealogy. ~ from Janet Cochran, Kentucky
your 2 year old is now 12, 5' 3" tall, and starting Jr. High. ~ from Patricia Hill, Kentucky
your cat has her kittens under your desk and you don't even notice it. ~ from Patricia Hill, Kentucky
you forget the names of your kids and husband and call them by names of you longgggggg dead ancestors. ~ from Patricia Hill, Kentucky
your husband looks at Discovery Channel "Naked Tribes of the Zulu" then back to you while you are sitting engrossed in your ancestry file. ~ from Patricia Hill, Kentucky
someone asks your 3 1/2 year old daughter if she knows who the President of the United States is and she says "George Washington". ~ Laurel Anderson, ?

HOME - HOUSEWORK

you think every home should have a microfilm reader.
you store your clothes under the bed and your closet is carefully stacked with notebooks and journals.
your dining room table is stacked with piles of genealogical stuff which, of course, you do not want anyone to touch - (mine is!) ~ from Nancy Green, Colorado
you're of the firm opinion that 100 years from now, no one will ever know that you didn't keep up with the laundry and bills. ~ from Laura Tuttle, Florida

JUST CAN'T QUIT

when you check into a motel, you first pull out the phone book and look for family names... and then take it to the office to get a photocopy for your files. ~ from Pat McMillion, Alabama
you try to use the remote control to down scroll the TV screen. ~ from Joan Mezger, ?
you've traced every one of your ancestral lines back to Adam and Eve, have it fully documented, and still don't want to quit.
people start leaving the room as soon as you say "My great-great......." ~ from Your Host, Virginia
the first place you look in a book is the INDEX. ~ from Nancy Green, Colorado
you take a break long enough to go to the doctor, then you tell them you were born in 1843. ~ from Mary Rucker, West Virginia
you hide the phone bill from your spouse. ~ from Laura Tuttle, Florida
you continually complain that you have a need for names, dates and places. ~ from Laura Tuttle, Florida
you're up till 3 in the morning, reading message boards, that have nothing to do with your family. ~ from Janet Willard, ?
your goal is to find 10 dead people a day! ~ from L. Thomas, ?
you can't give up looking for a gggrandfather born in 1824 (who you know is dead) because you think he might be waiting for you to find him. ~ from Laura Jones, Arkansas
you can't wait to get the next thousand names compiled into the GEDCOM. ~ from Sheila Stratton-Peel, New York
the doctor tells you that you have to go into ancestry detox / rehab or lose you eyesight, hearing and the use of your hands from too much reading, writing, driving and phone calls. ~ from Patricia Hill, Kentucky

LIBRARY

you shout BINGO over the microfich in the library. ~ from Joan Mezger, ?
you brake for libraries.
you get locked in a library overnight and you never even notice.
when you are online in the Virginia Library and Archives and your spouse asks you if he had an important phone call about the same time as a stranger knocks on your front door, telling you that "I tried to call but..." ~ from Nancy Green, Colorado
you've become the single source of income for the Mormons. ~ from Claudia Doyle, Louisiana
you have no taste for work of any kind, except feverishly looking through records at libraries and courthouses. ~ from Laura Tuttle, Florida

OTHER

dead people seem more interesting than live ones. ~ from Kathy Card, ?
you feel like an egg, looking for the chicken that laid you. ~ from Helen Moore, Washington
you have a blank expression, sometimes deaf to spouse and children. ~ from Laura Tuttle, Florida
you have a strange, faraway look in your eyes when your children enter the computer room. ~ from Laura Tuttle, Florida
you've hit a brick wall so many times with the same ancestor, you refer to him as "Slippery Sam". ~ from LaVerne Rowe, Missouri
the only dancing you do is the "Snoopy" dance when you find your most wanted ancestor. ~ Malcolm Haner, Washington
you have hemorrhoid surgery and 3 days later you are sitting on a cushion in front of the computer looking at GenWeb pages for 12 hours a day. ~ from Janet Cochran, Kentucky
you grab the new calendar each year and enter the family reunion dates in first followed by possible dates to visit the out-of-state archives where most of your ancestors are listed. ~ from Carla Odom, Virginia
the postal clerk asks if you want the money order receipt and you say "no, I'm just looking for dead people." (You should have seen the expressions on the other customers' faces!). ~ Nancy Grace, Texas
you are car sick and vomiting in a bag in the back seat of a car when someone says something that triggers a thought and you raise your head out of the bag long enough to say "Nancy Lewellen married Alfred Burgan in Tipton County, Indiana". ~ from Ellen Monroe, Mississippi

PLACES

your idea of a fun vacation includes a library, courthouse and a couple of cemeteries. ~ from T. Hodges, Kansas
you stay in the theater after the movie is over to read the credits. ~ from Joan Mezger, ?
you spend your vacation sitting in the hotel room reading the phone book. ~ from Joan Mezger, ?
you can pinpoint Harrietsham, Hawkhurst and Kent on a map of England, but can't locate Topeka, Kansas.
you can't vacation in Yellowstone because you don't have ancestors there. ~ from Ross Malone, Missouri
you spend your spring break in Kentucky looking for cemeteries and libraries, not with everyone else in Florida. ~ from Mandee Poole, Indiana
you're on vacation and you see a county sign on the highway where you can do some research and insist on stopping. ~ from Gail Swain, North Carolina

RELATIVES

you're actually happy to find out that you have the same great grandfather on BOTH sides. The genetics may be bad, but it sure simplifies research. ~ from The Lockwood Family
you've exclaimed at least once, "Egad! I'm surely NOT related to those ________'s!" when you discover that the gene pool has gotten pretty shallow since the family's fine old colonial planter heritage. ~ from Betty Cravens, Kentucky
your spouse wishes he/she had been born in the 1800s - that way you'd know he/she was alive. ~ from Sandra Oakley, Virginia
you think everyone is related to you. ~ from Mara Benoit, Rhode Island
you're happy when you find a moonshiner or murderer in the family because their records will be easy to find at the state pen. ~ from Elaine Martin, Texas
you feel closer to your dead relatives than the live ones. ~ from Sheila Stratton-Peel, New York
both you parents are born in the same village, and after you trace back 200 years, you have to type the same name 6 times to fill all the slots on your tree. And it is accurate! And it happens 6 more times!!!! ~ Joanne Riddle, Ohio